How I became an Atheist and found God.

The Voyage and Back.

How I became an Atheist and found God by Magicthreadworks

Theories, they are the new me. Making sense out of chaos, is my contribution to myself. Well my latest theory says:-

THOUGH ATHEISM IS THE TRUTH, BUT WORLD IS NOT AN EASY PLACE FOR AN ATHEIST TO LIVE.

The first part of the statement might not raise many questions, because this statement is under debate for centuries now and somewhere deep down we know it’s true. But still most of us like to go against it, reason being the second part of the statement.Life is an indefinite loop of monotony, if we see it from a human perspective, I wake up in the morning, do regular work, and go back to sleep at night. All these new inventions and discoveries we have introduced lately, are just to break this monotony.

Now if I am religious, then i would see this whole life as a stage play, where i have to play a part somewhere in the climax (Climax being the ultimate motive of my life, one thing for which i was born and other usual blahs) and till that happens I have to prepare myself for this unknown situation in the best possible way. It’s like God wants me to do an impromptu act with the best of my abilities. So whenever some good or bad occasion happens, these are the God’s ways to tell me if I am going in sync with or against the plan which God has already thought of as his great climax.There is a big flaw in the making of a human, they are given brains, that’s why it is important for us to look for logic in everything.

A religious human obtains his logic in the slight variation of the above explained scenario. But in the case of Atheism logic gives a grotesque view of life. Consider, there is no God and I being a human is doing the same thing everyday. I have no idea till when i’ll be continuing this whole routine. It might happen that the very next moment is the last one of my life. I realize that nothing is in my control. There is no purpose whatsoever of my being except that while I lived I made a few other lives ( who again doesn’t have any aim just like me ), happy.

But if I am so cynical about this whole God thinggy, then just making others happy is not a good enough reason for me. I have seen the sea and mountains once, doesn’t they all look the same after a point of time. I have read a few stories, but don’t most of them end in a similar manner? What if I don’t know how to play flute or violin, what difference would it make even if i knew them. I am going to die one day, just like billions of other people who are living the same age as I.

Even if I live as a Good or Bad person, in both cases, my end will be death. Even if I make the right or wrong decision, it’ll remain the same. Even if I read all of philosophy, my life remains useless. Quite a depressing picture.You might argue that I am being mean to Atheists. The religious humans do nothing good then fight for useless causes, themselves. Well, I can’t agree more with you. But I find, most of the Atheists are cynics and sadists (I am one myself) just because they know the brutal reality and accept it.

I am not saying there is anything wrong in it but just that life gets a bit difficult for them. The life of a religious human is rather easy. I was an Atheist myself once, and have now decided to move back to the safe and secure life of religion ( Even though it is my personal God and it’s my personal religion). I consider myself too timid a human, to go against God’s will. Though I truly respect Atheists, as they are those who know the truth and have the courage to live it.

Just finished watching "Charlie St. Cloud" and I would like to finish by saying -We got just one life,TO BE WHO WE WANT TO BE,TO BE WHO WE COULD BE.

Background music - Trains and winter rains (Enya)

P.S. This post was first published on April 21, 2011 under the title The Voyage and Back. This has been a landmark post for me, not only because it gave me an insight into a person I am and became the foundation of the person I have become over years. More so because this was the post because of which I connected with the love of my life and everything else is history.